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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27727298">If At First</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/3RatMoon/pseuds/3RatMoon'>3RatMoon</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Golden Deer Route, Floriography, Golden Deer Ferdinand von Aegir, Interpersonal Conflict, M/M, Minor Character Death, Post-War Recovery, Resurrection, Suicidal Thoughts, Tea Parties</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-20 11:28:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>19,712</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27727298</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/3RatMoon/pseuds/3RatMoon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Ferdinand courted Hubert. Then, they ended up on opposite sides of the war.</p><p>Hubert died. Ferdinand became Governor of Adrestia. Ferdinand courted Lorenz.</p><p>Then, three years after the end of the war, Ferdinand brought Hubert back from the dead.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ferdinand von Aegir/Hubert von Vestra, Ferdinand von Aegir/Lorenz Hellman Gloucester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>51</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>HELLO, yes this is another wip, no I'm not sorry</p><p>I AM sorry that this fic is going to have a lot of "love triangle" dynamics. I hope that the story makes clear that the characters and their decisions drive this dynamic, and not a general denial of polyamory. I'd LOVE for these three fools to get their act together and, well, get together, but we'll have to see if that happens lmao</p><p>Regardless, I hope you enjoy the story!</p>
    </blockquote><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The resurrection of Hubert von Vestra and its immediate aftermath.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Warnings for this chapter include suicidal thoughts and violence of the choking variety in part iii</p><p>Thanks so much to Metallic_Sweet for being such a thoughtful and generous beta!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>I. Lorenz</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lorenz never thought he would have to dispatch a search party for Ferdinand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He woke that morning in Ferdinand’s bed, alone. This was normal for him; Ferdinand rose with the sun and went riding before breakfast. Lorenz took his time getting ready, making himself presentable for the meeting between the Adrestian and Leicester lords later that morning. It had been nearly three years since Edelgard’s war ended with the attack on Enbarr— within the very palace where Lorenz was staying— and the regions were recovered enough for trade to flourish again. Lorenz, as Governor of Leicester, was in Enbarr to discuss such things, and he tried to keep that in mind, even if the trip did also bring him to Ferdinand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand was Governor of Adrestia and just as busy as Lorenz, so Lorenz did not feel slighted when he did not come to breakfast. He probably got caught up somewhere speaking with someone. Lorenz considered himself a good conversationalist, but Ferdinand had a gift, to the point where he seemed to runneth over with words at times. Lorenz hoped he at least managed to grab something from the kitchens before the meeting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t until Lorenz was stopped in the hall connecting Ferdinand’s rooms to the rest of the palace by Ferdinand’s aide, Natan, that Lorenz had any cause to worry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good morning, Governor,” Natan said in an even tone. “May I speak with you a moment?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz had been making his way towards the meeting hall, but it was his habit to be early, so he had time. “Of course.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sensing something from the aide, Lorenz drew them both into an alcove. There was an old granite bust of a former Emperor at the end, too precious a piece of history for Ferdinand to get rid of but kept largely out of sight.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Natan stepped a little closer, lowering their voice. “I went to retrieve Governor von Aegir for the meeting this morning, but I have been unable to find him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz felt as if he had swallowed a stone. “I see. Have you checked the gardens?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Natan nodded. “I have checked all of Governor von Aegir’s usual places as well as conducted a general sweep of the palace.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz took a careful breath. Though he was a guest, he was the highest ranking official in the palace besides Ferdinand himself, as well as Ferdinand’s betrothed. Natan needed further direction. It was not often that the leader of Adrestia simply went missing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You have recourse to the palace guard to help you with a more thorough search,” Lorenz said. “Keep it quiet as long as you can manage; it would not do to cause a panic. I will handle the lords.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Natan bowed. “Thank you, Governor.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After they left, Lorenz continued on his way to the meeting hall, where lords from Leicester and Adrestia were gathering. He tried to put Ferdinand from his mind. He would be found safe and sound, he was sure, and even if not, it was out of his hands. Lorenz was a leader, a pillar of society, and it meant that he had to carry on regardless of the circumstances.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz went to the head of the table.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good morning,” he said when all the lords had assembled. “Unfortunately, Governor von Aegir is indisposed at this time, so I shall be leading today’s meeting with Alberic until such a time as he is available.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alberic, Ferdinand’s secretary, gave a small bow. Some of the Adrestian lords muttered amongst each other, but did not ask any questions. Lorenz could not determine if that was a good or bad sign.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz sighed. “Alberic, first on the itinerary?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The meeting turned out to be a mess. The Adrestian lords seemed to take Ferdinand’s absence as permission to make as many demands as they could get away with, more than one absurd. The suggested tariffs were almost double what Ferdinand had suggested in talks with Lorenz before, and the Leicester lords were outraged. Lorenz only barely kept control of the room, and ended up having to call the end of the day early in order to prevent any further escalation. The only benefit was that the chaos distracted him from worrying about Ferdinand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz was trying to extract himself from a conversation with Count Hevring when Natan came up to him, wide-eyed and windswept.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We found him,” they whispered in Lorenz’s ear. “But he is not well.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz hardly remembered excusing himself, just that he was in the meeting hall one moment and being led down the corridor another.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where are we going?” Lorenz asked once they were out of earshot.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The dungeons,” said Natan. “I have already sent for the healers. He was unconscious but stable, last I saw him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz’s heart was in his throat. “The dungeons? What on earth was he doing down there?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know not, Governor,” Natan replied. “It… it is something you ought to see for yourself, I am afraid.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz peppered Natan with questions the entire way. Who found him? When? Did they leave someone with him? Was he hurt? Natan answered each one, even as they began to lose their breath hurrying down stairs and corridors. Finally, they reached a room flanked with guards, and Lorenz could see several more people inside. All sense leaving him, he rushed ahead and inside—</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The smell hit him first. The air was thick with magic, filling his mouth and nose, almost choking him with the acrid, metallic taste. He hadn’t smelled magic like this since the attack on Shambala. However, there were no towering machines, just cabinets and tables and a great slab with something on it, covered in cloth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz hardly noticed those things, instead focusing on the figure slumped against the wall behind several kneeling healers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ferdinand!” Lorenz cried, as though the man could hear him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>One of the healers turned around. Manuela.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh good, you’re here,” she said, perfectly calm as she always managed to be when things were serious. “He is alright, just unconscious. He seems to have exhausted himself doing… whatever it was he was doing down here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz moved closer. Ferdinand’s head lolled to the left as it always did when he started to drift off. He was pale, but watching closely, Lorenz could see the rise and fall of his chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Only then did Lorenz look around at the room. Cabinets and shelves lined the walls, filled with glass containers and strange apparatuses. Lorenz had never seen the laboratories that the old Adrestian Empire’s dark mages had built underneath the palace, but Ferdinand had told him about them. Lorenz thought they had all been cleaned out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz turned to the slab. His heart clenched seeing it. He had been in enough battles, spent enough time laying out the dead for families to look through for relatives, to know that there was a body underneath the cloth. Carefully, he approached the head, steeling himself as he reached for the shroud.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz’s breath caught in his throat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had expected a face he didn’t recognize, some poor soul fallen victim to whomever was still haunting the dungeons. He was not expecting the face of Hubert von Vestra, right hand of the last Emperor of the Adrestian Empire, the accomplished dark mage who commanded the laboratories to be built, the man who once was Ferdinand’s classmate, friend, and…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It couldn’t be Hubert. Hubert had died in the assault of Enbarr, three years prior. The body looked like it hadn’t been dead even an hour. Carefully, Lorenz reached out a hand and touched the man’s cheek.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He snatched it back like he had been burned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert was warm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Impossible,” Lorenz heard himself say out loud.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was when Hubert’s eyes opened.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>II. Ferdinand</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Ferdinand woke up, he was in his bed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That did not bode well.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had gone in secret, in the early hours of the morning. Everything went how it was supposed to. He powered the stone with his crest, Hubert started to breathe, and then he thought he would just sit down for a moment to rest…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then he woke up in his bed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand looked around. Lorenz’s nightclothes were on the screen that separated the bed and dressing area from the rest of the room, and the towel next to the washing basin was slightly rumpled, but Lorenz was not there. The slant of the light through the window suggested that it was the afternoon. The meeting with the lords would likely be done for the day.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand did not have to wait long for someone to enter. The gears of the palace were always turning. Normally, such a thing comforted him, knowing that there was never absolute stillness, but now, he suspected it worked against him. He should have known he could not rest when the ritual was over. He should have known that he could not be found to be missing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His first visitor turned out to be Manuela, along with another healer to come check on him. Upon seeing him awake, Manuela sent the other healer away, probably to fetch Lorenz.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz. Ferdinand had lingered in bed that early morning, looking at the way the moonlight played upon his hair. He had kissed the man’s brow, and he had barely stirred. Lorenz was generally a light sleeper, but he was exhausted by both travel and their enthusiastic lovemaking, as was common when they saw each other again after being apart for months at a time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand should have done the ritual sooner, when Lorenz was days away in his own territory. However, Ferdinand had gone to battle too many times, and he was sentimental. He couldn’t help but need to see Lorenz one more time before everything changed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lorenz is going to be furious with you,” Manuela said, sitting down in a chair at his bedside.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand smiled. “I know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela frowned. She did not look surprised. She was his professor for most of his time at the Officer’s Academy, and before that, she was a diva at the opera and his childhood idol. He admired her greatly, even if she stayed with the Empire during the war. Perhaps because of that, Ferdinand allowed himself to be more vulnerable around her when she came into his life again as the house healer. He tried to live an open and honest life, but it was a tactic as much as anything else. Manuela likely knew when he was telling one truth to keep a different truth hidden.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, let us have a look at you,” she said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She checked his pulse, listened to his heart and lungs. She used a light spell to look down his throat and into his eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“By all accounts, you are right as rain,” she declared once she was done. “You merely overtaxed yourself magically and need a day to rest and drink plenty of tea—not black tea, mind.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I will ask for mint leaves,” Ferdinand promised.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela nodded to herself and stood, but halfway to the door, she stopped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ferdinand,” she said softly. “What did you do?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand sighed. “I am sorry, Manuela. I would prefer to save explanations for Lorenz.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela shook her head, but she did not object. “Then, just take care of yourself for now. I don’t want to see you out of bed before this time tomorrow. Do you hear me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had straightened her back and was looking down at him imperiously, every inch the stern professor and cunning actress all at once, and Ferdinand couldn’t help but smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You have my word, my princess,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand could see Manuela’s lips lift just a little before she turned away and left through the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand spent his brief time alone considering what he would say to Lorenz, but in the end, he already knew what he was going to say. He had spent the better part of a year thinking about what he was doing and why. Lorenz may not agree with him, but he would understand him, at least. He always did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz was as beautiful as ever when he arrived, violet hair sweeping out behind him as he strode inside the room with purpose. He was wearing a dashing lilac jacket and white trousers, which reminded Ferdinand of his armour during the war. It was a good look on him. Ferdinand knew Lorenz always tried to look his best for meetings with the lords. He had to thank him later for handling that meeting while he was out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lorenz,” Ferdinand sighed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz met his eyes. “Ferdinand,” he said. “I spoke with Manuela. I… am glad to see you are well.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand watched as he approached the bed slowly, stopping when he was still a fair distance away. He crossed his arms. He clearly had other things to say, so Ferdinand waited patiently in the silence</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please,” Lorenz whispered. “Please tell me what was in that room was not your doing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand swallowed. “I do not wish to lie to you, my dear.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz was quiet again. He took a breath in. Out. He folded his hands together. They were shaking. He looked up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand took his own breath. When he imagined having this conversation, he was standing, not sitting in a bed. He dealt with an irate Lorenz, not this quietly furious one. Still, he could adapt his vision.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So many people died in the war,” he said steadily. “Good people. People we knew. Do you not wonder if we could have somehow reconciled our differences? Did you not once wish for a second chance?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz’s brow furrowed. “I…” his eyes flicked away for a moment. “Why – if that is what you are after, why </span>
  <em>
    <span>him </span>
  </em>
  <span>of all people?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand sighed. “He was the only one that the ritual would work with,” he said. It was the truth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz shook his head. He was not satisfied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You kept all of this from me,” he said. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand had been wrong. Lorenz wasn’t quietly furious. He wasn’t even angry. He sounded almost defeated.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was not how it was supposed to go.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I—” Ferdinand started.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz held up a hand. He had turned away from Ferdinand, unable to even look at him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I have heard enough,” he said. “I have things to attend to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz left without another word. Ferdinand was still for several moments before he sighed and leaned back against the pillows.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela and the other healer came to check up on Ferdinand a couple times during the evening, and staff came by with food and mint tea, but conversation was sparing. No one mentioned Lorenz or Hubert, and Ferdinand did not ask. Lorenz did not come to bed. Ferdinand had wondered if he would or not.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand feigned sleep when someone came by to blow out the sconces. Then, he waited another hour. No one came. Slowly, Ferdinand sat up, swinging his feet down to the floor. He put a casual tunic on over his sleeping clothes, and soft slippers with leather soles.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Perhaps it was good that Lorenz did not come to sleep with him tonight. He had things that he needed to do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He needed to see Hubert.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>III. Hubert</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hubert’s new life began in fits and starts. He did not remember much beyond Ferdinand holding him while the sky burned above. He thought he saw Lorenz once, which was strange.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Slowly, his wits gathered again. He was in a bed in a guest room of the Imperial Palace. Healers flitted about him like wrens in a thicket, checking his vitals and plying him with herbal teas. For once, he accepted the drinks, as he felt strangely parched.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ah, he realized after a while.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Perhaps that would be because he had died.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It seemed impossible, at first. Death was most notably one of the few things there was no coming back from. However, he did not think that the afterlife looked like a guest room in the Imperial Palace with healers stealing glances at him like he was a ghost. The last part was especially pertinent: Hubert was used to being feared, but the way the healers acted suggested something had spooked them beyond his normal disposition.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Theirs was a look given to someone who defied the laws of nature.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he finally had the strength and wherewithal to examine himself, his observation only contributed to his theory. He was more than gaunt. His body had atrophied, his skin tight to his bones. He looked mummified.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And yet, he lived. How strange.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he could no longer seek answers on his own, Manuela appeared as if called upon.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“At last, a face I recognize,” Hubert said, though it came out as little more than a hoarse whisper.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela’s eyebrows shot up. “My goodness, you are doing even better than I thought,” she said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It is not difficult to be better than dead,” Hubert wheezed before a great cough racked him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela was at his side in a moment. She stroked his back while he coughed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So you have figured that out,” Manuela said once Hubert had stopped. “What do you remember?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I remember Enbarr burning,” Hubert whispered. “I remember something piercing my chest. Falling. Ferdinand came to me, the fool, crouching over an enemy like a friend…” He took a breath. “Darkness. Some faces above me, like a dream. Then, I awoke here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela was silent.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who brought me back?” Hubert asked. “How? Where is Her Majesty?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We do not know. I suspect Ferdinand did, though he has refused to say anything to me.” Manuela paused for a long moment. “The… Edelgard is dead, Hubert.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert felt his world tilt abruptly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They had never been naive. He and Edelgard had always known they may fail. Hubert had a letter for Claude explaining everything he knew about Those Who Slither in case of such a thing. However, there was a reason why he had stationed himself at the palace gates when the Alliance invaded. If they were to die, he was to die first, to die serving her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was never meant to outlive her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why –” Hubert croaked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know,” Manuela said. “I think you would have to ask Ferdinand.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert took in a shuddering breath.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Leave. Leave me alone.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela stood. “I will check on you again later,” she said, likely as a warning. She hadn’t gotten around to doing anything to him, yet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Leave,” Hubert said again, hating the weakness in his voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela left.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everything kept going as it had been. Healers came and went. Tea was given. Vitals were checked. Hubert did not notice time passing until night fell. Manuela came by again as she had said, bearing bone broth and more tea. She checked him over like the other healers, then had him lift and stretch his limbs at various angles. Hubert was quite weak, which displeased him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, he was more than displeased by Edelgard’s death. He returned to it over and over again, anxiety mounting as he obsessed. What was he doing alive if she was dead? What use was he other than as a trophy pet for the victorious? Why? Why?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He realized, in a detached sort of way, that he was panicking. Healers came to him during his episode and tried to calm him, but he lashed out, forcing them to knock him out with a spell. When he woke, it was the dead of night, no candles lit and no sounds in the halls outside his door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Would that the darkness swallow him again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, in the quiet, there was a click, and the door opened. Hubert squinted as his eyes adjusted to the light of the candle his guest was holding.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ah,” Hubert rasped. “I was wondering when you would come to see me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hubert,” Ferdinand said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? Are you going to tell me I look good for a dead man?” Hubert smirked. “I heard you were the one who did the deed. Is that true?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand was quiet for a moment, his face impassive. It seemed the man had learned a thing or two about not giving all his secrets away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” he said eventually.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert felt his smirk turn into a nasty little grin, which he was sure was made all the more ghastly by the state of his face. “Ah, well, in that case…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert was weak, but he was happy to find that his magic leapt to his fingers just as easily as before. Ferdinand’s eyes widened just a fraction before a burst of Miasma hit him directly in the chest, flooring him.  The candle went out as it and its holder clattered to the ground. In the darkness, Hubert fell upon Ferdinand while he struggled to recover.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How dare you!” Hubert screamed hoarsely, reaching down to grasp Ferdinand’s throat. “I died doing my duty! I died with purpose! Now you bring me back?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand gasped and spluttered. Hubert squeezed harder, his body shaking with rage but his hands too weak to comply. He leaned closer so Ferdinand could hear him speak.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I knew you were a traitor, but this? This is reprehensible.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The noise finally brought the guard in, and they separated the two of them. Ferdinand coughed heavily, clutching his throat. Hubert felt some satisfaction that he had done some damage.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The guards were saying something, but Hubert didn’t listen, only watching Ferdinand. Once he had regained his breath, he looked up at him, and he did not look angry. His face was not twisted with grief. Instead, he looked almost like he had expected it all. That, if anything, made Hubert more angry. But then, one of the guards knocked him out again, leaving him to the blissful darkness.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If only it could stay that way.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Yodel with me on twitter @3RatMoon1</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Lorenz finds some answers. Ferdinand gives some answers. Hubert visits the greenhouse.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Warnings for a brief suicidal thought in part vi.</p><p>Thanks again to Metallic_Sweet for being the best beta one could ask for. ;3;</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>IV. Lorenz</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lorenz slept poorly. The guest quarters that were prepared for him every visit felt unfamiliar after so many times spent in Ferdinand’s bed. He was cold. All he could think about was how his beloved had welcomed him so sweetly while knowing what he was about to do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz had been to war. He had been bred for war. He had accepted the consequences and assumed that his former classmates had as well. To make war was to deal in death. He had become intimate with it, working the medical tent and digging graves for his enemies.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz knew as well as the rest of the Golden Deer what had happened to the Goddess and Her children, but he still could not shake his faith. This all seemed like an affront to the Goddess Herself, an affront to nature.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That it was Hubert only stung Lorenz deeper. Ferdinand had said that Hubert was the only one who the ritual would work on, but he could not believe that it was the only reason. He knew who they had been to each other before the war.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After spending the whole night dozing or ruminating, Lorenz decided it was light out enough out to warrant getting up. He dressed himself in navy blue and lavender, with shoe ribbons in Gloucester purple. He hoped that the lords would accept a rest day so Ferdinand could recover and help run the next day’s meeting, but he was prepared to lead on his own again if necessary.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz called for one of the palace staff to bring tea, only to have one of the guard arrive first.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My apologies for the early visit, Governor,” said the guard with a bow. “There was an incident that occurred during the night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz already felt his pulse pounding. “What happened?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Governor von Aegir was found in the, er… guest’s quarters,” said the guard. “The guest was attacking him. Governor von Aegir sustained some minor injuries but is well. The guest is now under a spell of Silence and a second guard is posted to his room.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz rubbed his temples. “Is Ferdinand awake now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I do not know, Governor,” the guard admitted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz stood. “No matter. Thank you for informing me. You may return to your post.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz stepped out of his guest room into the hall. His shoes made sound even over the carpets as he walked at a strong clip towards Ferdinand’s rooms. Thoughts stewed like storm clouds as he walked, everything that had haunted him through the night mixing with this new anger over Ferdinand’s foolishness. What was he thinking? What did he even expect, resurrecting such a man as Hubert?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz walked right into Ferdinand’s room. Ferdinand was in bed reading, a cup of tea sitting on the end table next to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lorenz,” he said, looking up in surprise. “You are up early.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His voice was rough, and as Lorenz got closer, he could see bruising around his neck.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> go to see him,” Lorenz said, accusatory.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I had to,” Ferdinand said, closing his book.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, you did not!” Lorenz shouted. “You could have simply asked after him! Instead, you go at the dead of night and nearly get yourself killed—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He wasn’t going to kill me—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“— all because you wanted to see for yourself just how wretched he is!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand looked pained, which gave Lorenz a little thrill of victory. “Lorenz…” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If I had been in bed with you, would you have tried to sneak away like you did the night before?” Lorenz asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand couldn't meet his eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz felt himself burning with righteous anger. “You didn't tell me about your plans to resurrect Hubert; you didn't tell me you were to go see him last night… What else aren't you telling me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There is nothing else I would keep from you,” Ferdinand promised.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz scoffed. “And how am I supposed to believe you?” He put his head in his hands. He realized he was breathing too fast. He was a wreck. “I can't go back to Gloucester like this,” he said. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, a thought occurred to him. He lifted his head. “I won't. I won't go back to Gloucester.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz looked to Ferdinand, who was watching him cautiously.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are welcome here as long as you wish, my dear,” he said after a long silence.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh,” said Lorenz. He had been expecting resistance. “Well, good.” He was still for a moment, then turned towards the door. “Then, if you will excuse me, I have some arrangements to make considering my extended stay. I will return as soon as I am done.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arrangements turned out to be fairly simple. Lorenz sent a few letters, including one to Gloucester requesting that mail be forwarded to him in Enbarr for the following month (with future instructions to follow as necessary). He also informed his aide of his stay and gave them the afternoon to make their own arrangements. The palace would provide for them both as guests, and Lorenz had enough clothes for the month, as he tended to overpack.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The day’s meeting with the lords was postponed to the next morning, and Ferdinand rejoined them in his full capacity. He brought the Adrestian lords to heel and soothed the Leicester lords to a compromise. Lorenz was always astonished when he watched Ferdinand work, and a bit envious. He knew himself to be a good leader, but he was aware that he came off as strict or cold at times. Ferdinand’s morals were just as strong, but his demeanor was warm. He inspired others to do better rather than forcing them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz found himself watching Ferdinand speak with Count Hevring with the ease Lorenz couldn’t summon before and wondering how much of Ferdinand’s charm was a front. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He did not used to think such things.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz tried to swallow down the sudden lump in his throat, and turned to speak with someone else.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Later that week, Lysithea arrived in response to Lorenz’s letter. They greeted each other and had tea before Lorenz took her down to the dungeons where Ferdinand had been found with Hubert. The room had been left untouched, Lorenz unwilling to investigate without an expert with him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lysithea’s nose wrinkled when she stepped into the room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gross, it smells like Agarthan magic,” she said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was worse a few days ago,” Lorenz said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lysithea made a face at that, but Lorenz knew she had filed away that detail for later.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Together, they started working through the texts scattered across the shelves. These were written in various hands, some recent and some archaic. Lorenz was surprised to find a journal by Hubert among them. He flipped past the opening pages, delving in with more interest than the other texts, which he felt a small amount of shame over. What was he going to find there? That Hubert had conspired with Ferdinand across enemy lines to come back from the dead?</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You can’t be sure,</span>
  </em>
  <span> a small part of Lorenz said. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He lied for however long he planned to raise Hubert. Why not longer?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The notes were scattered, but Lorenz was able to determine that Hubert had gotten some essential information from the Agarthans, or “Those Who Slither in the Dark”, as he called them. Pages detailed the preservation of bodies, as well as surgeries that Lorenz felt sick looking at. He considered skipping a few pages, but a bit of circled text drew his eye. This page was filled with abbreviated words with a distinct slant, like Hubert couldn’t write fast enough. In the circle:</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>TWS can raise the dead</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lorenz,” Lysithea said, a little shiver of excitement in her voice like she used to get when she made a breakthrough in her studies. “Come look at this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I also found something,” Lorenz replied, crossing the room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lysithea had a leather-bound folio open on the slab that once held Hubert’s body. The page on top had a rough diagram of a human figure opened at the chest. Over the heart was a circular object. Lorenz suspected he knew what it was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lysithea pointed at the diagram. “Isn’t this what Archbishop Rhea did to Byleth?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I believe so,” Lorenz said. “The crest stone became the power source for their body when their heart refused to beat.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He put Hubert’s journal down next to the folio. “The Agarthans had some technique to raise the dead as well,” he said. “Though, the body had to be fresh, or otherwise preserved, which Ferdinand would not have known to do until it was too late.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not for Hubert,” Lysithea said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz looked up. “Pardon?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lysithea held up her hands. They were stained a faint purple. “Dark magic pollutes the body, right? Hubert doesn’t have a crest, so he was probably much worse than me when he died. And the magic doesn’t just affect the caster. All the graves of dark mages I’ve seen are barren. Nothing will grow on them.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He wouldn’t rot,” Lorenz said. He put his head in his hands. “Ferdinand was telling the truth. Hubert was the only one with a body intact enough to revive.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>V. Ferdinand</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Lorenz had promised, he stayed in Enbarr even after the trade meetings had ended. The meetings were difficult at first, as the Adrestian lords had run amok while he was recovering and deeply offended the Leicester lords, but Ferdinand was able to smooth things over. He reminded everyone of the mutual benefit of lower tariffs on each side, and suggested the possibility of more profits when it came time to trade abroad. The final agreement was close to what Ferdinand had predicted, and that pleased him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It felt good to have Lorenz around. Rather than acquiring his own office, he set up at Ferdinand’s reception table in his. They kept each other company as they worked, helping each other with wording on letters and brainstorming solutions to complicated matters. Lorenz seemed to relax again, as much as he was capable.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, when they went to bed, Lorenz clung to him as if he would disappear in the night. Ferdinand held him in turn, an unspoken response.</span>
  <em>
    <span> I will not leave you.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ferdinand hoped Lorenz believed him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There were also many difficult conversations still to be had.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You brought Lysithea to the dungeons,” Ferdinand said carefully in the evening as they got dressed for bed. “You could have simply asked me what I did.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz finished lacing his sleeping trousers before speaking. “Forgive me if I could not hear from your lips what terrible things you have done,” he said, tense.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand sat up from where he had been lounging on the bed. “What terrible things? I stole nothing. All of the documents were under my jurisdiction as Governor, all of the materials from the laboratories, even the Imperial Mausoleum and its contents—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Agarthan technology is dangerous!” Lorenz cried.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And so is a spear!” Ferdinand answered. “I am a dangerous man, Lorenz. You knew that even before you decided to court me. You do not want to hear me speak of the terrible things I have done? What of the war, then?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The war was different!” Lorenz protested. “We had our duty to protect our people!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand didn’t answer for a moment, looking down at his hands, willing himself to put the words together even as his mind resisted the thought.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Duty does not make me feel any less of a monster for the relish I took in the slaughter,” he said softly. “Duty does not make me desire any less that my hands were good at things other than killing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz stood from the vanity and went to Ferdinand, taking his hands in his. There was still anger in his eyes, but it was tempered with concern.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why did you never tell me you felt this way?” he asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand looked at their joined hands.  He loved Lorenz. He wished he had better answers for him.“I do not know,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz was silent for a long moment. Ferdinand had a feeling that he was not thinking about the war anymore.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you still love him?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand swallowed. It was a sudden change of subject, but one he had been expecting for a while. “Yes,” he said. “He hates me, though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And if he did not hate you?” Lorenz asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It would not change how I felt about you,” Ferdinand replied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz was silent again. His hands had tightened around Ferdinand’s.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Slowly, Ferdinand leaned forward, kissing Lorenz’s bare stomach.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let me show you how I feel about you,” he whispered. He kissed Lorenz’s hip where it peeked out from the waistband of his sleeping trousers. “Let me show you the way you have taught my hands something other than killing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Slowly, Lorenz unfurled. He hands slid from Ferdinand’s and into his hair. Pulling gently, he tipped Ferdinand’s head up. He leaned down to meet him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>VI. Hubert</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand did not visit again for several days.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert remained confined to his bed, though he was slowly getting stronger. Manuela had him doing exercises every day to slowly regain the muscle he had lost. Still, the Silence spell itched under his skin, reminding him that they did not want him too strong. The other healers tried to be kind to him, offering him coffee or to read to him, but he refused to acknowledge them, to accept their assistance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He would get stronger, then he would wring Ferdinand’s neck.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He did not know what then. Manuela told him that Claude and his Golden Deer had taken his letter and gone to destroy Shambhala, scattering Those Who Slither to the winds, so there was not even that goal to fulfill. He could always track down those who remained and kill them all one by one, but…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert balled up the bedding in his fists. He hated this purposelessness more than anything. It was still tempting to choke on his own Miasma after he killed Ferdinand for what he did. Even so, one did not usually get a second life, and his inner tactician wanted to find some way to use this unique advantage.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert was interrupted in his thoughts by a knock on the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come in,” he drawled. His voice had been the quickest to recover, and he poured every ounce of his disdain over this farce of politeness into it. If they were to come in anyway, why bother knocking at all?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert was expecting Manuela, or perhaps Ferdinand, but he saw neither.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lorenz Hellman Gloucester,” he said, almost pleased. “What brings such a distinguished guest to my bedside?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz made an expression like he had swallowed a lemon, but perhaps that was just his face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hubert von Vestra,” he replied, his voice even despite his obvious displeasure. “I hope you are doing well. I thought it time to reacquaint myself, considering our places in the Palace as long-term guests.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert sneered. “Oh, did Ferdie bring you back from the dead as well?” Hubert did not think it was the case, mostly asking to provoke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz flinched. “No, I am simply here to watch over Ferdinand.” His back straightened. “In particular, I am here to protect him from you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t say?” Hubert replied. “And who gave you such an assignment?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz raised his chin, looking down his nose at Hubert. “I did. As Governor of Leicester and Ferdinand’s betrothed—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Betrothed!” Hubert laughed. “Ah, now I see your motivations. You are here to protect your dashing prince from his monstrous creation.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Am I wrong?” Lorenz asked, taking a step towards Hubert. “You tried to kill him the moment you saw him!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Perhaps,” Hubert said. “But perhaps you should pay less attention to the monster confined to his bed and more to the monster sleeping in yours.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz’s eyebrow twitched. “I see you are as poisonous a presence as you have always been,” he said icily. “I will be here to check on you periodically, though, so you might as well start learning how to be sociable.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cut down your insufferable ego by about half and I will consider it,” Hubert said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Perhaps, if you do the same,” Lorenz returned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert grinned. “It seems we are at a stalemate.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz left soon after that, and Hubert was alone again with only the occasional visit of Manuela or another healer. The days blended together, occupied mostly by sleep and rumination. Eventually, he graduated from needing a bedpan to needing assistance using the chamberpot. It was humiliating, but Hubert tried to remind himself that it was temporary. He was getting stronger, however slowly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Roughly a week after Hubert first awoke, Manuela came to his room pushing what looked like a chair on wheels.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought it might be good to get you out of bed for a little while,” she said cheerfully.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And I assume I have no choice in the matter?” Hubert asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course you do! I will just be a terrible bother if you refuse,” Manuela said with a smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert sighed. “Take me to your contraption then, I suppose.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It felt good to be on his feet for a moment, even if it was greatly strenuous for him even while leaning heavily on Manuela’s shoulder. Then, he was sitting on the chair, and Manuela was laying a blanket over his lap. Sitting there while he was pushed across the room was strange, but there was some novelty to it. He wondered who came up with the design.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When they emerged into the guest corridor, then the more grand halls of the palace, Hubert found himself scrutinizing every detail. The structure of the palace remained the same, but there were many small, subtle changes. Statuary corridors emphasized philosophers and writers instead of Emperors and generals. The Hresvelg coat of arms was gone, and the double-headed eagles of the Empire were replaced with a single-headed variant crowned with a green star. The carpets, drapes, and chandeliers were all the same, but the message was clear: this was a new peaceful, subservient Adrestia, far from the one Edelgard had envisioned. The only thing that surprised Hubert was that there was not any of the Aegir lion present. The palace was effectively Ferdinand’s home with no Emperor to claim it, and Hubert would have thought he would have his mark everywhere to be seen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert had been so engrossed in the decor that he didn’t realize where they were going until he was blinking in the brightness of the midday sun.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela took in a breath and sighed happily. “Isn’t it nice to have some fresh air?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I suppose.” said Hubert, before a cool breeze brushed by and chilled him suddenly. A shiver wracked him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, yes, the wind will blow right through you as you are right now,” Manuela said with a laugh. “Hopefully there will be more of you soon enough, but the weather is warming up. Regardless, we’re only going to be outside for a moment.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good,” Hubert grumbled, continuing to shiver.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela steered the both of them down the garden path, and soon Hubert saw their destination. The greenhouse was not somewhere Hubert visited often, having his own collection of plantlife, but it seemed to be largely the same as it had been. The air was warmer inside than outside and a bit humid. There was a gardener Hubert didn’t recognize spreading new soil in one of the raised beds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good morning,” she said, wiping her brow with her forearm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Afternoon, now,” Manuela replied with a cheeky grin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ah! Goodness, time flies when I’m in here,” said the gardener with a laugh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela chatted with the gardener for a while, letting Hubert take in the greenhouse. He identified various plants from Brigid, which needed the year-round heat and humidity to thrive. There were some plants from Morfis, and one weak little coffee plant from Almyra, along with a number of varieties from Fodlan itself. Manuela pushed him a bit further into the greenhouse as the gardener moved to a different bed, and Hubert saw a few plants he didn’t expect.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Belladonna and hemlock,” Hubert said out loud. “Interesting choices for the Adrestian collection.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The gardener looked up from her work. “Oh, yes. I am inclined to agree, but the Governor himself asked to have them moved here after they were found during clean-up. He said they had their own unique beauty.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert’s eyebrows rose. “I see.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The plants were likely the very ones he cultivated himself. The gardener clearly didn’t know, but Ferdinand would have.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert wasn’t sure what he thought about it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, I should be getting our guest back to his quarters,” Manuela said, giving Hubert something else to pay attention to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ah, well, it was a pleasure meeting you both,” said the gardener. “Have a good afternoon!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert paid less attention to his surroundings on the way back to his rooms. He was getting tired again; Manuela must have noticed before he did. There was also the matter of the plants. The hemlock was being overwatered, and there was a spot on one of the belladonna’s leaves. He would have to tell the gardener sometime, perhaps offer some of his own expertise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You were quiet for most of your outing,” Manuela said as they entered Hubert’s room. “Did you enjoy yourself?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert paused a moment. “I suppose,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Manuela smiled. “Good! I’ll have to take you again. We could make it a daily thing, going out for a bit.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The idea of being seen as he is did not appeal to Hubert, but when he thought about the greenhouse…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I will consider it,” he said.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>As always I am on twitter @3RatMoon1</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Lorenz is not yet ready to leave Enbarr. A terrible tea time is had. Hubert takes up gardening.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks so much for all of the comments and encouragement on twitter! I appreciate it so much.</p>
<p>Thanks of course to Metallic_Sweet for being an excellent beta</p>
<p>Warnings for this chapter include description of character death (Hubert's, in flashback), mention of other character deaths (other Black Eagles) and description of a couple corpses in part VIII.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>VII. Lorenz</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Time passed, and Lorenz became restless.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Things went well. Lorenz set up at the reception table in Ferdinand’s office. They kept each other company. Ferdinand kept his promise to not go see Hubert again until he was feeling less murderous. Of course, Lorenz saw the flowers when he went to Hubert’s room, but Lorenz could not find any code within the blooms. In the end, Ferdinand was just being a good host.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert, as far as Lorenz was concerned, was not as good of a guest.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Would you like for me to call for tea?” Lorenz asked on one visit.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Coffee. No tea,” said Hubert.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz’s eyebrow twitched, an awful little tick that all but gave away his irritation. “Terribly expensive, coffee,” he said, keeping his voice light. “Relations with Almyra have been looking up since the new king came to power, but it will likely still be some time before the prices come down.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I am sure the Governor of Adrestia can manage the fee,” Hubert replied.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Perhaps, but from what I have heard, your habits put quite a dent in your finances,” Lorenz continued. He remembered Ferdinand’s giggle when divulging that particular secret, which he had found in the former Minister’s books. “I would be remiss if I were not to consider that in consultation with the Governor about his guest.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert sat back in his chair. He had started to be able to move about more freely, though he was still largely confined to his room. “Are you the reason why he’s not been by to visit?” he asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz raised an eyebrow. “Do you still intend to kill him?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert gave a nasty little grin. “I haven’t decided, yet.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Despite Hubert’s threatening demeanor, indecision was actually an improvement. Everything was going well. But as the days marched on and the end of Lorenz’s month of extended stay grew near, he did not feel… however he expected to feel. Satisfied? Safe? He was very familiar with his work being completed in his absence, carried out by letter or his aides, but such an approach felt inadequate for this situation.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He didn’t want to leave.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I meant it when I said that you were welcome here as long as you wished to stay, my dear,” Ferdinand said when Lorenz brought this up. “You are fully capable of making the decision that best balances your personal needs and the needs of your office.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I would disagree. We are both very much prone to overwork,” Lorenz said with a little smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand caught that smile and returned it with his own. He approached Lorenz with a swagger, putting his hands around his waist. “And look how much progress we have made on that, distracting each other from work in the evenings.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I suppose,” Lorenz said, dipping his head demurely.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand leaned forward, pressing a kiss to his lips. “I have an idea. A test of how you feel about the state of things here.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And what is this test?” Lorenz asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Join me for tea tomorrow at eleven in the gardens,” Ferdinand said. “I will show you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz sighed. It wasn’t the first time Ferdinand had withheld a surprise from him, but he had to admit that he was usually pleased by the results. He reminded himself of this even as his mind clouded with trepidation about the next morning.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright,” he said, kissing Ferdinand back. “Tomorrow at eleven. Now, just let me finish up this letter, and we can have dinner.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The next morning was clear and temperate, light dancing off the last lingering dew on the hedges in the gardens. The roses were budding, and a part of Lorenz found himself looking forward to seeing them bloom, even though he was unsure if he would even be present for it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand was dressed handsomely in a teal jacket and pale blue ascot, his hair in a horsetail brushed over one shoulder. A small spray of chamomile flowers sprouted from his buttonhole.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Aren’t you just dashing today?” Lorenz said, taking his seat to Ferdinand’s right. He noted a third chair at the table.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And you are a lovely vision, as always,” Ferdinand said, taking Lorenz’s hand and kissing it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz flushed, as if they hadn’t been caught macking on each other in an alcove early on in their courtship. “Are we expecting another guest?” he asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Indeed, we are!” Ferdinand said brightly. “In fact, I believe that is him coming now.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Down the path, Lorenz saw what looked to be Manuela pushing a wheeled chair, and sitting in the chair, looking as sour as ever…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Lorenz choked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hubert!” Ferdinand called. “Welcome! You are just in time!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Instead of replying, Hubert turned to Manuela. “I can make the rest of the distance on my own,” he said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t tire yourself out before your day has even started,” Manuela said, though she did not stop Hubert from taking his crutch and levering himself out of the chair.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How am I supposed to increase the strength in my legs if I don’t use them?” Hubert shot back. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Manuela did not say anything further, just watching him go with a little shake of her head. It seemed to be a well-worn argument between them. She took a moment to wave at Lorenz and Ferdinand but did not linger, instead turning back the way she had come.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You invited </span>
  <em>
    <span>Hubert</span>
  </em>
  <span> to tea?” Lorenz whispered to Ferdinand, watching Hubert make his slow way to the table.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It is the perfect way to gauge how we all feel about each other, and how you feel about the situation as a whole,” Ferdinand whispered back. He didn’t look the least bit worried.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Goddess help us,” Lorenz mumbled.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>By then, Hubert had reached the table. With an effort, he pulled the chair back and sat in it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Gentlemen,” he said, summoning a perfect sneer despite seeming to be out of breath. “I do hope I am not interrupting.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course not!” Ferdinand replied. “Thank you for making the time to join us this morning. Would you like some tea? It is Rose Petals today.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz had a moment to be touched by Ferdinand’s choice of his favourite tea before Hubert said, “I would prefer coffee, of course.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand smiled. “I had a feeling you might say as much. Luckily, I came prepared.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>From the side, a servant approached the table with a kettle and coffee press. As they set the press down and poured hot water from the kettle into it and the tea pot, Hubert aimed a smug look at Lorenz. Lorenz rolled his eyes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How generous of you, my dear,” he said, allowing just a little bit of his displeasure into his voice.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The coffee was a gift from the new Almyran king,” Ferdinand said. “I felt inspired by his generosity, you could say.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz tried to not let his eyes bulge out from his head. He was using Claude’s gift on </span>
  <em>
    <span>Hubert? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Lorenz must not have been too successful, because Hubert only looked more self-satisfied.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know, the Almyran way of making coffee is a bit different from Fodlan’s,” Ferdinand continued. “It comes out much more rich and sweet. I quite like it, myself, though I know you don’t like sweetness much, Hubert.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Right you are,” said Hubert.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I liked the Almyran coffee I’ve had, as well,” Lorenz said pointedly. “The gift from the King came with all the instruments to make it in that style, did they not? We shall have to try it ourselves sometime.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand smiled. “Of course! There are still plenty of beans left. Just remind me when you would like to have some.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz smiled back, soothed by Ferdinand’s attention. “Of course, my dear.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert coughed politely. “Now, I am told that you are both the Governors of Adrestia and Leicester, respectively. Forgive my ignorance, but I am not aware of what is required of such offices.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz almost chided Hubert for not asking Manuela, who knew plenty well such basic information, but Ferdinand launched into an explanation himself. As he poured the coffee and tea for everyone at the table, he broke down the current governmental structure from Byleth as Sovereign, to the three Governors, to the lords and their territories.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hm, so the system of nobility remains intact,” Hubert said at the end of it. “How disappointing.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz scoffed. “This is hardly appropriate for tea.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Normally, I would agree, but my discussions with both of you have taken a political turn at times, have they not?” said Ferdinand. He was no longer smiling, but looked earnest in a way that reminded Lorenz of when they were younger. “Indeed, the lords maintain power over their territories for now,” Ferdinand said, folding his hands in his lap. “However, in three years’ time, the Sovereign has planned public elections for all positions of government, including all the territories of each region.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I cannot imagine an election going particularly well, admirable though the effort may be,” Hubert replied.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The less-traveled path tends to be less certain, but that does not make it less worth traveling,” Ferdinand said smoothly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert sneered. “I do recall having a more expedient method.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz felt Ferdinand tense next to him. He reached for his cup of tea to have an excuse not to say anything.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand was quiet for a long moment, then said, “Considering what I lost in the war, I hope you may forgive me for being reticent in using such methods.” He looked up at Hubert, and his eyes were like fire. “Considering what </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> have lost, I would like to believe you understand.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert barely contained a snarl. “I am afraid I do not follow. Do you care to elaborate?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand did not flinch. “Perhaps some other time, Hubert.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Still glaring, Hubert took a drink from his cup, then pushed his chair back and stood. “If one of your staff could so kindly call Manuela back to me, I would be very appreciative. I am easily tired these days, unfortunately. Thank you for the coffee.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Then, leaning on his crutch, Hubert turned his back and hobbled away. Lorenz watched him go, slightly stunned.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand’s anger seemed to drain away, and he slumped down in his chair. Sighing, he reached for a lemon tartlet. Lorenz hadn’t realized that they hadn’t even eaten anything, yet.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I had hoped for better, but I had certainly imagined worse,” Ferdinand said, cutting into the tartlet with the side of his fork. “What are your thoughts, darling?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz paused in the middle of taking a scone spotted with dried currants onto his plate. In his life, he was not sure he had been to a more brief and tense tea time. However, when he had first seen Hubert, he had expected to need interference from the guards. Even so, Hubert was once an assassin, a Minister, and the Imperial Spymaster; he was likely well-practiced in the polite facade. Was it good that Ferdinand was able to break it?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz swallowed. “I… think I may need more time to think it over, dear.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>VIII. Ferdinand</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The invasion of Enbarr was easily one of the best and worst days of Ferdinand’s life. It was the end of the nearly six year long nightmare that was the war, but it ended with the destruction of his home and the murder of people he once called his friends. He had known it would come to this, one way or another, but the knowing and the doing were very different from each other.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He had largely been spared, before; Byleth had been able to recruit Petra and Bernadetta, and Ferdinand wasn’t present when Lorenz took down Caspar. Linhardt deserted shortly after that, leaving just Dorothea, Hubert, and Edelgard in Enbarr.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert was by far the worst.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand spotted him at the palace gates, already engaged with Claude, who circled him on his wyvern. Ferdinand urged his horse forward, trying to get to them faster. They hadn’t discussed who would take on which commanders. Claude maybe thought it a kindness to take Hubert on himself. It was no secret who Hubert had been to Ferdinand. But suddenly, Ferdinand felt the need to be there, that it should be him engaged with Hubert, that he should be the one to land the final blow— </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand reached them just as one of Claude’s arrows landed in Hubert’s chest.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand might have screamed something.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert staggered and fell.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand didn’t register dismounting from his horse, only that he was on his knees, pulling Hubert’s head into his lap.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hubert,” Ferdinand whispered.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert’s eyes focused vaguely on Ferdinand. “Ferdin—” he gasped. “You – fool—”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hubert,” Ferdinand said again, but Hubert was already gone.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ferdinand!” Claude called from above. “Open the gates!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That snapped Ferdinand out of it. He eased Hubert’s head back onto the ground and stood, running for the gates.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand did not cry when Edelgard had fallen and the war was finally over. He did not cry as he oversaw the burial of her, Dorothea, and Hubert in the Imperial Mausoleum. Instead, it was six months later, when he had been named Governor and was in the process of clearing out the retainer’s room in the palace.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>All of the content of the chests, drawers, and wardrobe were all laid out on the bed and tables for him to look over. Ferdinand’s chest felt tight just looking at the rows of shoes and neatly-rolled stockings, the mundane leftovers of one of the most feared men in Fodlan.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Then, he found the letters.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They were an unassuming stack of paper, but when Ferdinand looked, he recognized his own handwriting.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <em>
      <span>11 Horsebow, 1180</span>
    </em>
  </p>
  <p> </p>
  <p>
    <em>
      <span>Hubert,</span>
    </em>
  </p>
  <p> </p>
  <p>
    <em>
      
    </em>
    <em>
      <span>I deeply wish to respect your desire to keep this quiet. It is my desire, as well. If you would have these letters written in a cipher, so be it, but I would like somewhere I can express to you the depths of my passion…</span>
    </em>
  </p>
</blockquote><p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand flipped through the papers. Hubert had kept all of them, all the ridiculous love-sick writings he had sent while they were at Garreg Mach. Ferdinand would have thought, after their terrible parting, that he would have burned them or thrown them away. Instead, Hubert kept Ferdinand’s letters, just like Ferdinand had kept Hubert’s.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand had to cancel the rest of his appointments that day and the day after. He stayed in his rooms, where he screamed and cried into his pillow so the staff wouldn’t hear. In the days after that, he had more composure, but occasionally, he had to blink away sudden tears. In time, it did not hurt as much, but there remained an ache in his heart like a scar.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Then, there was Lorenz. They had been close throughout the war, sharing tea times, late nights, and tents on campaign. They had held each other’s hands and whispered encouragement in each other’s ears. They fell into bed one night in Derdriu after one too many glasses of wine, and when Lorenz began to panic about the impropriety, Ferdinand confessed and asked to court him right there. Things had been done a bit out of order, but Ferdinand found no problem with that.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They were insufferable for the few months of their courtship, each riding to visit the other almost monthly and sending letters daily, filled with poetry and sweet words. However, as time went on and the fires of their passion mellowed, it became clear how well they complimented each other. Lorenz’s specialized knowledge met Ferdinand’s broad visions. Ferdinand’s spirit lowered Lorenz’s guard. Working together, Leicester and Adrestia flourished. Laying together, they bloomed under each other’s hands, able to give each other the gentleness they could not grant themselves.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>If Ferdinand was still faithful, he would thank the Goddess every day for Lorenz. The scar of Hubert remained, but Ferdinand had accepted its ache in his life along with Lorenz’s joy and comfort.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Then, two years after the end of the war, Ferdinand’s codebreakers solved one of Hubert’s foremost ciphers, and things changed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In Hubert’s diaries, they found notes for a hidden stash of books in the laboratories, books believed to contain Agarthan secrets. Ferdinand was there for the opening of the secret cache, and he spent several evenings combing through their contents. He didn’t know why he took such an interest in the books, except that they were Hubert’s but more distanced than the diaries that he dared not read. Indeed, it was Hubert’s notes on the Agarthan tomes that Ferdinand took the most time with, reading through them in their entirety.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That was how Ferdinand found out that the Agarthans knew how to raise the dead. And, once Ferdinand knew, the thought would not leave him be.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He counted the dead: Edelgard, Hubert, Dorothea, Dimitri, Ingrid, Ignatz.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>What if they could all have a second chance? What if the damage of the war could be undone?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand gave in bit by bit to the idea. He found the sources cited in Hubert’s notes and read them the best he could, studying the diagrams, redrawing them with his own notes. He revisited his old lessons on Reason. He was not a mage, but he started to understand the theory.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In the end, the ritual only needed three components: a body, a crest stone, and a strong magical surge. There were a number of crest stones still in the laboratories, waiting for Seteth and Byleth to decide their fates, and Ferdinand’s Crest would provide a sufficient magical surge. The majority of the Agarthan texts instead focused on complex methods of preserving a body well enough for it to support life. That was where Ferdinand came up short.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Except…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It had been an off-hand comment one night in Garreg Mach, while he and Hubert lay tangled together on his bed. Ferdinand had suggested something, teasing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ugh, over my dead and rotting corpse,” Hubert had groused. “Not that I would rot, polluted as I am.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That was how Ferdinand found himself in the Imperial Mausoleum for the first time since Edelgard’s burial. The form she had taken was so large that a whole new space had to be made for her underneath the mausoleum proper, which Ferdinand found somewhat fitting for the last Emperor of Adrestia. However, that was not who he was there to visit. Instead, he went to the space at the end of the small walkway, a slot in the wall like the many others that held the bones of former Emperors and consorts. The von Vestra had their own mausoleum, but the level of Hubert’s devotion (and probable part in his father’s sudden death) called for Ferdinand to place him at Edelgard’s side.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As he approached the slot, Ferdinand clasped tight the torch in his hands, his heart in his throat. There was no smell of rot, but it had been two years since the burial, leaving most of the work of decomposition already done. Still, Ferdinand could not help but hope.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Carefully, he held up the torch to read the plaque.</span>
</p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <em>
      <span>Hubert von Vestra, Minister of the Imperial Household, Last of His Name</span>
    </em>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>
  <span>Bracing himself, Ferdinand looked at the body.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His gasp echoed in the stony silence of the tomb.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert was whole. He looked thin, almost emaciated, his eyes sunken, but he was whole. Curious, Ferdinand went to Dorothea, on Edelgard’s other side. She was in much worse shape, shrivelled and mostly bone under her fine clothes. Ferdinand returned to Hubert, hope bubbling in his chest.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Briefly, he looked to the door that led to Edelgard’s final resting place. Hubert wanted nothing more than to stand eternal vigil by his lady’s side. If Ferdinand were to be successful in bringing him back, it was very likely that he wouldn’t be pleased.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But, by then, the idea had taken root in Ferdinand. With the war over and the Agarthans vanquished, maybe Hubert could find something else for himself. Something like… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand dared not consider it. Just the possibility of a second chance was enough. He could not shake it, not even if Hubert hated him for it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He read and reread his notes up until the night of the ritual, making sure he understood everything. He practiced the sigil for months until he could trace it almost without thought. He only had one chance at it, daring not to practice on actual subjects. There was no way for him to know that it would work, but he had to try.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Meanwhile, life continued on. Ferdinand delivered orders in accordance with his five-year restoration plan, continued to develop his idea of a system of public education, and continued to court Lorenz. Ferdinand was, if anything, capable of holding many things at once, giving each his full attention in its own allotted time. It was only as the night of the ritual drew near, Hubert’s body already set up in the last of the laboratories, that thoughts of it started to bleed into other areas. He was thinking of it when he opened a letter from Lorenz, the paper dyed a lovely lavender and perfumed with roses.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <em>
      <span>My dearest, Ferdinand,</span>
    </em>
  </p>
  <p> </p>
  <p>
    <em>
      
    </em>
    <em>
      <span>How my heart leaps at the knowledge that, in two weeks’ time, I will be in your arms once again! Of course, I do not look forward to the trade meetings, but they are necessary, and I would soon face much worse just to see you…</span>
    </em>
  </p>
</blockquote><p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz. Ferdinand’s heart clenched at the thought of him. By the time they saw each other, the ritual would have been done. Lorenz likely would be about as pleased as Hubert.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>However, Hubert’s body could wait, and the gravekeeper wasn’t due to visit the Mausoleum for another two months.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Perhaps Ferdinand was being selfish. Perhaps all of it was being selfish. But, Ferdinand just wanted to see Lorenz one more time.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span> IX. Hubert</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Time passed, and Hubert grew stronger. Manuela had him standing and taking a few shaky steps after a week, and after two, he was given a crutch so he could move about his room on his own. The healers were constantly talking about how quickly he was recovering, but Hubert wondered on what metric they were measuring his progress. He was fairly certain he was the only man they had encountered who had come back to life.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lorenz came to visit roughly every other day, though all they did was snipe verbally at each other for a few minutes before he left again. Hubert knew Lorenz was the reason why Ferdinand didn’t visit anymore.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ferdinand was not entirely absent, though. Sometimes, a vase of flowers would find its way onto Hubert’s end table while he was sleeping. Other times, a book would appear from the Imperial library, often of a subject to Hubert’s interest. There was a small chance that the flowers were Lorenz’s doing, but Hubert doubted it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Who was so kind to bring me this bouquet?” he asked one of the healers, referring to the latest set of flowers, heather and azaleas.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh! Well, I did,” said the healer, before adding hurriedly when Hubert glared, “O-on the Governor’s direction, of course.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hm,” Hubert said. “Send him my thanks.” He made sure to add enough of a hiss to his words that the healer looked sufficiently confused and nervous as she left.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert sat back against his pillows and thought. It did not surprise him that Ferdinand knew floriography, as dedicated as he was to all the noble arts. Heather and azaleas in particular meant aid in one’s time of need, which was straightforward enough, but could there be other meanings?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert’s thoughts turned, as they often did these days, to the greenhouse. He had visited a number of times over the weeks, but the gardener happened to be absent each time. His plants were not in mortal danger, but it bothered him to see them mistreated.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Finally, during one such visit, Hubert scoffed and hoisted himself up from the wheeled chair.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hubert!” Manuela said in surprise. “Are you alright?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I am fine,” Hubert ground out, leaning heavily on his crutch to make the few steps towards his plants and carefully lower himself to his knees.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The spots on the belladonna had spread. He plucked off one of the leaves and examined it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Some kind of fungus,” he said out loud. “The rest of the plant is likely infected. Hm…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The doors to the greenhouse squealed as they opened.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh!” said the gardener. “Miss Casagrande and Mister von Vestra! Good afternoon!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Manuela turned and smiled. “Good afternoon, Ilse. It had been a little while since we last spoke.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So it has,” said the gardener, Ilse, before turning to Hubert. “Is there something wrong with the belladonna, or are you just admiring it?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert sighed a little, at last free to speak his piece. He showed the gardener the spotted leaf and gave his theory on the source.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ah, you are exactly right!” Ilse said. “Let me get the antifungal.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When she had disappeared into the shed, Manuela aimed a smile at Hubert.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Taken an interest in the plants, Hubert?” she asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>my</span>
  </em>
  <span> plants,” Hubert shot back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Manuela shrugged. “I had a feeling that they might be, after what Ilse said,” she said. After a moment, she added, “She might let you work with her, if you ask.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert scoffed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Manuela laughed. “I won’t force you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>At that moment, Ilse returned, a potion and spray device in her hands. It took her a moment to attach the potion and work the device, but then a fine mist sprayed over the belladonna.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“There! A couple days of that and it should be right as rain,” she said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert nodded. “Good.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ilse turned towards him. “You seem to know your horticulture.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mostly only poisonous varieties,” Hubert quipped.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ilse hid her expression behind a hand, coughing politely. “Er, well, I have heard that Miss von Varley has a fondness for carnivorous plants. It takes all kinds, I suppose.” She aimed a smile at Hubert. “What I’ve been meaning to say is that I could use a hand here in the greenhouse, if you are interested.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ilse looked shy, asking. She probably still thought gardening was work beneath him. Indeed, Hubert had never done such menial work since Garreg Mach, when the students were tasked with maintaining most everything themselves.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Behind Ilse, Manuela put her hands on her hips and raised her eyebrows at Hubert, grinning.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Void help him, he accepted the offer.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert couldn’t do much of the work at first. Instead, he picked his way through each of the plants in the greenhouse, examining them for signs of distress. Ilse was a bit chatty for Hubert’s taste, but she was more intelligent than he first took her for. They discussed possible ailments for the plants Hubert spotted looking unusual, and Hubert learned about which plants grow well together and which had to remain isolated in pots, lest they take over the beds.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>On days when Hubert had more energy, he started working with plants directly, pruning, watering, and repotting. The sensation of rich soil in his fingers pleased him in a strange, animal way. He found himself seeking out the greenhouse, especially when he was angry or his thoughts were tangled together in ways out of his control. He thought initially that the simple work would leave his mind free to wander, but what he found instead was that his thoughts went eerily, blissfully quiet.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>After a disastrous tea time with Ferdinand and Lorenz (honestly, what was he expecting?), Hubert went to the greenhouse to wait for Manuela. He visited the hemlock and belladonna first, looking at their leaves and probing the soil with a finger. It was a bit dry; Ilse was doing better to not overwater, then. Hubert fetched the watering can.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once he was done, he sat down on the edge of one of the raised beds and thought.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Now that his mind had stopped howling </span>
  <em>
    <span>how dare he speak of Her Majesty,</span>
  </em>
  <span> he remembered what Ferdinand had said. “Considering what I lost in the war…” What had Ferdinand lost that compared to Hubert’s loss of Edelgard?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It suddenly occurred to Hubert that Ferdinand was very likely talking about </span>
  <em>
    <span>him. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Ferdinand, who had betrayed Hubert and their nation as a whole. Ferdinand, fool enough to wear chamomile in his buttonhole like he thought he could mend all the wounds between them with a simple tea time. Ferdinand, who very well had Lorenz now to dote on him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And yet.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And yet.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ah, there you are!” Manuela’s voice carried through the greenhouse. “I was told that you were done with tea early, but when I came, I couldn’t find you anywhere.” She approached him, pushing the chair. “Are you alright?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I am perfectly fine,” Hubert grumbled.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Certainly, you look better than I expected for walking across half the gardens on your own, but that’s not what I meant,” Manuela said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert sighed and stood. “I do not wish to talk about it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Manuela made a face, but did not protest. Hubert sat down in the chair and let her begin pushing him back towards his rooms. Always, the shadow of a guard followed them, keeping up the spell of Silence.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know,” Manuela started after a few minutes of silence, “Ferdinand is notorious for overworking. I’ve only known him to take a day off twice.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“This is not of interest to me,” Hubert said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Let me finish,” said Manuela, flicking at his shoulder. “I’ve only known Ferdinand to take a day off twice. One was when he first started courting Lorenz.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert scoffed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The other,” Manuela continued, “was when he was going through your things after he gained ownership of the palace.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert paused, mulling her words over. “Why are you telling me this?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He can be difficult to parse sometimes,” Manuela said. “I thought it might help. Both of you— even Lorenz, actually— all three of you think you are above emotion, or can be if you try hard enough. But we are all emotional creatures. We can’t escape it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They did not say anything else to each other that day. Hubert found himself pondering her words for a while afterwards. He thought of Ferdinand and what had said, what else lay behind his words. He thought of the bouquet of heather and azaleas, the spray of chamomile in his buttonhole.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hubert decided that he had more to say to him. And, now, he thought he might have a way to say it, as well.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>You are always welcome to yell about these fools with me on twitter @3RatMoon1</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Hubert sends a message. Ferdinand sends one in return. Lorenz finds connection where he least expected it.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks again for all of the encouragement I have received in comments and on twitter. I really appreciate it!!</p><p>As always, Metallic_Sweet has been a wonderful beta and cheerleader on this project.</p><p>One chapter left, y'all!!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>X. Lorenz</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lorenz woke up holding Ferdinand. Ferdinand had started staying in during the morning when Lorenz began his extended stay. Lorenz had not asked him to. He would feel guilty for keeping Ferdinand from his morning ride, except that they had started going riding together in the evenings, just as the sun was setting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz must have shifted or sighed because Ferdinand rolled over to face him. He was stunningly beautiful in the morning light, almost too bright to look at.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good morning, love,” he said, so soft and sweet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz didn’t say anything, just burrowed into Ferdinand’s broad chest. Lorenz could feel his chuckle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll leave you be,” Ferdinand said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz shook his head, still firmly in Ferdinand’s chest, and then looked up at him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is so lovely that I almost forget what has happened, but I cannot forget completely,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand’s face fell, and he averted his gaze. “I understand.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even having admitted that, Lorenz stayed in bed tangled with Ferdinand for several more moments before he finally got up. Ferdinand followed him, picking out his clothes for the day while Lorenz washed up and shaved.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They did not speak of Hubert. Lorenz had extended his stay another two weeks after the disastrous tea party. That spoke enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz wasn’t even sure what he would say, otherwise. Would he demand that Ferdinand put Hubert back underground himself? Would he ask questions until the answer he most dreaded and half-expected fell from his beloved’s lips?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Eventually, Ferdinand filled the silence. He chattered about the horses and his reading and his plans for the day as they had tea and breakfast. Lorenz listened, and eventually, he was pulled into the conversation. Talking was so easy with Ferdinand. They had talked each other’s ears off taking tea in Garreg Mach and written each other novels in letters over the war and after. They had shared silences as well, easy and uneasy, but talking was how they steadied each other, held each other without touching.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were still talking as they made their way to Ferdinand’s office. Ferdinand was saying something about a letter from Petra in Brigid when he opened the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She says that the cattle plague is still contained in Dagda— oh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz followed Ferdinand’s line of sight to the desk, where sat a large herbal bouquet. Lavender and flowering basil spilled out from one of Ferdinand’s glass vases. Lorenz immediately bristled. He knew enough of floriography to read its message. Distrust. Hatred. Betrayal.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What!” Lorenz exclaimed. “Who would leave such an offensive arrangement?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand approached his desk curiously. “I do not see a note,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz’s mind reeled. “Is it a threat? Careful, darling! What if there is something hidden in there?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am being careful,” Ferdinand assured him, slowly circling the bouquet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was on its opposite side to Lorenz when he stopped suddenly, his hand going to his mouth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ferdinand?” Lorenz asked, quickly going to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand was pale. With his free hand, he pointed to the bouquet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hidden away behind the shield of basil and lavender, where it would be visible only to Ferdinand seated at his desk, there was a spray of rosemary around a single camellia bloom.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I remember our lost love,</span>
  </em>
  <span> it whispered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hubert,” The name came out shakily from Ferdinand’s mouth. “He… he has taken to working in the greenhouse lately…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The words caught on the tinder still in Lorenz’s chest. Angrily, he reached to scoop the bouquet from its vase. Water dripped from the stems onto his shoes, but he didn’t care. “Here, let me take these down to the kitchens. They can probably do something with all these herbs.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz was about to turn to leave, but Ferdinand raised a hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can…” He paused, swallowed. “Leave the camellia?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz looked at the flower. It was the one part of the arrangement that couldn’t be reused. Lorenz always thought they were quite pretty. It would be a shame to waste it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course, dear,” he said, plucking the camellia from the rest of the bouquet and handing it to Ferdinand. Ferdinand took it. He was no longer so pale, but his gaze was far away. He twirled the stem in his fingers idly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well,” Lorenz said. “I will be back once I drop these off.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank you, dear,” Ferdinand said distantly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was still pondering the flower in his hands as Lorenz left.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz couldn’t stop thinking about the bouquet, even after he disposed of it. He kept glancing at the camellia, now alone in the too-large vase, and each time his heart would burn anew.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Eventually, he couldn’t stand it anymore. It was the afternoon, and Ferdinand was entertaining Constance in the gardens. Lorenz had declined an invitation to join them, as he was behind on work, but left alone, he could not focus. His mind kept snagging on the rosy hues of the camellia in the corner of his vision.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Letting out a growl of frustration, he finally stood from his table. In two strides, he was at Ferdinand’s desk, and he snatched the camellia from the vase before turning and marching out the door. It did not take him long to reach Hubert’s room, every member of the palace staff taking one look at him before clearing the way. His hand fell heavy on the guest room door, the knock echoing in the hall.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a little while, the door opened, revealing Hubert’s gaunt, sallow face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good afternoon, Governor,” he said, in his voice that always seemed to be mocking even while being perfectly polite.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The part of Lorenz that favoured discretion led him to wait until he had stepped inside and Hubert had closed the door. The part of him that favoured dramatics led him then to throw the camellia at Hubert’s feet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Explain. Now,” he said, cold and furious.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert looked down at the flower, now slightly rumpled. When he looked up, he raised one sparse eyebrow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are versed in the language of flowers, are you not? One would think the message was loud and clear,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Why?</span>
  </em>
  <span><em>”</em> The question burst from Lorenz like a fireball. “You tried to kill him!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I did say I hated him,” Hubert replied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You said you loved him!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The look Hubert gave Lorenz was suddenly very serious. “The two are not mutually exclusive,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz didn’t know what to say to that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert sighed, leaning a bit more on his crutch. “Someone told me once that humans are emotional creatures. That it is inescapable, try as we might to rule our lives with reason and logic.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz looked at Hubert.  Hubert looked back. He looked as tired and angry as Lorenz felt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were both tired, and they were both angry at Ferdinand. They both loved him still.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ferdinand,” Lorenz said suddenly, “is a bit of a bastard.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert was still for a bare second before a bark of a laugh burst from him. It was the most genuine thing Lorenz had ever heard from him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert looked up at Lorenz, grinning. “Ferdinand is the most purebred bastard you will ever meet.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz couldn’t help it. He laughed as well.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>XI. Ferdinand</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand had trouble concentrating after the bouquet. He kept glancing at the camellia, now alone in the vase, then to Lorenz at his table with his own work. By the lines between his eyebrows, Ferdinand would have thought him in deep concentration, but after a while, Ferdinand noticed that he was still on the same page of the same report.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand was almost certain that the flowers had been left by Hubert. He had heard from Manuela that he was working in the greenhouse, and such a method of communication seemed to suit him. Hubert was quite gifted with words when he was persuaded to use them, but he always was more comfortable speaking in other ways.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand had suspected that Hubert still had a fondness for him ever since he found his letters among Hubert’s belongings, but now he was sure. The thought made Ferdinand’s heart flutter in his chest and his breath grow short.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, he would not ignore the rest of Hubert’s message. The camellia, alone in a full bouquet declaring hatred and distrust.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand had spent the weeks focused on Lorenz, spending time with him and respecting his request that he not go to see Hubert. Ferdinand had not ignored Hubert completely, leaving offerings of books and flowers, but they had not seen each other face to face since the unfortunate tea party.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Perhaps it was time for Ferdinand to make greater efforts for Hubert.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even as he thought it, he glanced at his clock and was shocked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Constance will be here any minute!” he said to Lorenz, putting his quill in its holder and standing quickly. “I need to go get ready. Did you wish to join us, my dear?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz looked up, a tooth snagging on his lip in a way that said he was tempted, but then he shook his head. “Ah, no, I do not think I can attend and finish everything I need to do,” he said. “I am woefully behind today.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand went to Lorenz’s side, leaning down to kiss his brow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I will be back at about five to distract you away from work again, so I hope you will have everything done by then,” he said with a little grin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz blushed. “Oh, go on, now, before you are late.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand smiled and left one more kiss on Lorenz’s cheek before he embarked to his quarters to freshen up. He tried not to linger, even though Constance tended to comment if he left anything askew, and managed to make it to their rendezvous before she arrived.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand chose to have tea with Constance at the same table in the gardens where he had met Lorenz and Hubert. A part of him irrationally wanted to change locations last minute to avoid the atmosphere of that past failure, but Ferdinand pushed through it. He picked the gardens because they were lovely. It was early summer, and the roses were just about to bloom. Ferdinand would not take his friend anywhere else.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ah, what a lovely day!” Constance said, smiling over the gardens. “Of course, you have my thanks for providing some shade.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anything to keep you comfortable, my friend!” Ferdinand replied. “The umbrella is in a suitable position for you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, yes, very suitable, thank you,” Constance said, then sighed. “I would have thought that I would become less sensitive to the light after some time back on the surface, but alas.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That is unfortunate, but thankfully not difficult to accommodate,” Ferdinand said. “Certainly not while you are here will I let you languish in the sun!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Constance tittered behind her fan. “You are such a dear, Ferdinand. Were I a different sort of woman, I would be jealous of Lorenz.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand felt himself flush. “You flatter me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I would say you did not need it, but you have grown surprisingly modest over the years!” Constance replied, and Ferdinand could see the smile in her eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Speaking with Constance was always a joy. Ferdinand found her bombastic personality reminded him of himself at times, and she always was forthright with her advice, which he appreciated. He was very pleased when he was able to help her restore her House, though he earned some of Count von Oche’s ire for forcing him to give back Nuvelle territory. Ferdinand found in Constance both a friend and an ally in bringing about the new Fodlan that he, Lorenz, Sylvain, and Byleth were slowly building together.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even so, entertaining Constance couldn’t free Ferdinand’s mind from his thoughts of Hubert. If he considered it, Hubert and Lorenz had filled his head over the weeks, disrupting his usual ability to put things aside and give whatever was in front of him his full attention. It troubled him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ferdinand, are you quite alright?” Constance asked, cutting through Ferdinand’s thoughts. “You went away for a moment, there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand sighed. “I had hoped it wasn’t so obvious.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please! Were you not going to tell your dear friend of your troubles?” Constance exclaimed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand hoped his hesitancy didn’t show on his face. He had a great fondness for Constance and had confided in her before, but he had never breathed a word about raising Hubert from the dead. He reminded himself that there had already been an official statement made on Hubert’s presence, that he had faked his death and was found living in the bowels of the Imperial Palace. He could speak the man’s name aloud again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s about Hubert,” he finally said, though he found he still lowered his voice, as if afraid someone would overhear.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Constance paused in the middle of her sip of tea. “Oh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand squirmed under her scrutiny. “You are aware of how we were before the war,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course,” said Constance. “Oh dear, don’t tell me you still hold a candle for that man!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand ducked his head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ferdinand!” Constance set down her teacup with a loud clink. “You were at each other’s throats as much as you were in each other’s beds!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand rubbed the back of his neck. “I thought it did not matter,” he said. “He is very much upset at me for… for bringing him here, and for my part in Edelgard’s fall. But then…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He explained the appearance of the bouquet. Constance listened, hands folded in her lap and face serious. After Ferdinand finished, she was quiet for a long moment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What of Lorenz?” she asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love him dearly,” Ferdinand said. “He is upset at me as well about my decision. I have been spending the past few weeks trying to make it up to him. He does not like Hubert at all, which I understand, but…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But you love him as well,” Constance finished for him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand sighed windily. “Yes.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Constance took a bite of pastry and swallowed politely before saying, “You’ve gotten yourself in a right mess, Ferdinand.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand couldn’t help but laugh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Constance let Ferdinand get a hold of himself before continuing. “Oddly enough, I do not think love is the issue here. Love is strange; sometimes it can be cultivated, but sometimes it comes and goes with no reason why.” Constance aimed a look at Ferdinand. “Rather, what I think you— all of you— need to figure out is how to live with one another.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand blinked. “Live with one another?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes!” Constance said, a little testily, pointing her fork at him. “Whether or not you continue courting Lorenz, start courting Hubert, both, or neither, they will be a part of your life and you a part of theirs. You need to figure out how you are going to do that. Will you dedicate your lives to making each other miserable? Or will you try something else?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand sat up like he had been struck by lightning.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know exactly what I must do!” he exclaimed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Constance watched him stand from his chair with a bemused smirk. “And I suppose you must do this thing right this very moment?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I— well, I suppose not,” Ferdinand said, still standing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Constance giggled. “Come and sit back down, you silly man! Let us speak of something else before you go off making grand gestures. I would like to finish my tea, at least.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand smiled sheepishly and sat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Now, tell me,” Constance said, folding her hands under her chin. “When are you planning your next ball?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>XII. Hubert</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hubert stayed in his room the day that he left the bouquet in Ferdinand’s office. He suspected that he would be getting a talking to, either by Ferdinand or Lorenz, and he wasn’t about to have such discussions in the palace at large.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was not surprised that Lorenz came to him, fuming, throwing the camellia at his feet. What surprised him was that Lorenz seemed to listen to him for once, and even possibly found something to relate to in his words.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ferdinand is kind of a bastard, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Lorenz had said, like it was a realization.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If only for a moment, they understood each other.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert thought it over as he sat at his desk, composing a letter to Bernadetta. Word was now out that he was alive, and he found that, of all the former Black Eagles, he wanted most to reach out to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wasn’t sure what to tell her. There were the simple facts, of course: he had been brought back from the dead by Ferdinand, and was slowly recovering his health. What else? He could write about his gardening. Bernadetta did have an interest in plants. Perhaps he could even invite her to come see his work.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He did not know how to tell her that he was glad she was alive, even though he will always feel hurt that she betrayed him and Edelgard. He did not know how to tell her that he did not know what to do with the new life he has been given. He did not not know how to tell her that he still wanted to kill Ferdinand sometimes, even though he knew that he no longer would if he was given the chance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert tried, but he found that he had rendered several sheets of paper almost illegible with crossings-out before he gave up and fed them to his brazier.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was when there was another knock at his door. Sighing, he levered himself out of his seat and made his way over.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Opening the door, Hubert was faced with a doorway full of white, pink, and purple blossoms, and peeking over them, a familiar face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ferdinand,” Hubert said, and found that his voice held a note of surprise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stepped aside, and Ferdinand stepped in, looking around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh good, someone left the vase from the last set,” he said, immediately going and divesting himself of his burden.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As he arranged the flowers in the vase, Hubert was able to see them more clearly. Hyacinth for apology. Olive for peace. Hawthorne for hope. Dogwood for love overcoming adversity.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert looked at Ferdinand, who was looking to where the camellia still laid on the floor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was wondering where this went,” he said, picking it up. “I had felt like this bouquet was missing something, and now I know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>With deft fingers, Ferdinand threaded the stem into the arrangement until the camellia sat snugly with the rest of the flowers. Then, he turned around and folded his arms behind his back, awkwardly formal.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I— hope you like them,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert watched him for a long moment. “Shouldn’t this be for Lorenz?” he asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lorenz did not send me a bouquet this morning,” Ferdinand said.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m sorry,</span>
  </em>
  <span> said the flowers behind him. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I love you. I hope you love me still.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Silence stretched between them. Hubert saw Ferdinand’s arms shift and flex, imagined his hands curling into fists, then releasing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I missed you,” Ferdinand whispered into the quiet. “I missed you every day.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert took a breath, tried to slow the frantic beating of his heart.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And so you brought me back from what was, as far as I know, a place of rest?” he asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand looked at his feet. “There were other reasons why I could only bring you back, but I will not deny that there were some selfish intentions.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Even with how we parted? Even knowing you had stripped my purpose from me?” Hubert’s voice was rising.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Despite Hubert’s outward aggression, Ferdinand stepped forward. “I wanted to give you a second chance. I wanted to give you a life without war, a life with an After.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert’s chest hurt. Why did this awful man have to be so damned earnest? “I was not made for an After, Ferdinand.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand smiled a little. “Oh, so now you believe in fate? What happened to the Hubert who defied the Goddess Herself?” A pause, and Ferdinand’s face turned serious again. “You do not have to forgive me. I am willing to accept the consequences of my actions. However, if there is even a chance that we could try to build something together… I hope I have made it clear just how far I would go for that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert swallowed. Ferdinand had taken his hand that wasn’t holding his crutch and was looking up at him with those bright sunset eyes. Hubert wanted to kiss him. Hubert wanted to sink a knife into his stomach. Without realizing it, he started to lean forward. Seeing the movement, Ferdinand’s eyes went half-lidded, his lips parting on a breath that Hubert could feel on his skin. They were so close, just barely an inch apart. It would take nothing to bridge that gap and…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand pulled away suddenly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I—” he croaked, then cleared his throat. “I still have to talk to Lorenz.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert scoffed. “Strange, the morals that you pick and choose to uphold,” he said, which was true but still reflexively unkind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand aimed a glare at Hubert in response, which made the hairs on the back of his neck prickle in delight. But, then Ferdinand slumped, as much as a man with ramrod straight posture could, as the fight seemed to drain from him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I understand that this does not fix everything,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It does not,” Hubert agreed. “And I will not be so kind as to give you five trials with which to regain my trust.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand smiled again, ruefully. “That is fair.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert could not help but smile back, just a little. He never could seem to resist this man for long. “But I shall let you try all the same.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand’s smile widened, reaching his eyes. “I am afraid that I have other things to attend to, if you will excuse me. But… perhaps you will grace me with your presence again in the gardens tomorrow afternoon?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert crossed his arms and looked down his nose at Ferdinand. “I suppose I can make the time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ferdinand’s smile turned into a grin. “I will make sure there is coffee! And you can ask me whatever questions you like about politics!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I will hold you to it,” Hubert said. “Now, off to your other duties.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, yes, of course,” said Ferdinand, getting his enthusiasm under control. “Good evening, Hubert.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good evening, Ferdinand,” said Hubert.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>With that, Ferdinand was gone out the door. Sighing, Hubert went back to his desk and collapsed in his chair. Everything ached after standing for so long. He was probably going to have a difficult time getting to the bed later.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But first, there was the letter.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert looked down at the paper for a while before glancing over to his end table, where Ferdinand’s flowers sat. He thought of Ferdinand leaning close, his breath across his lips. He thought of Lorenz’s slow realization.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hubert picked up his pen and began to write.</span>
</p><p> </p><p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <em>
      <span>Dear Bernadetta,</span>
    </em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>
      <span>You may be surprised to hear from me, or you may not. I find myself often still in the past, despite living in this new present. It is only recently that I have been thinking of the future again, and in that time, I have found that I would like to have you in it.</span>
    </em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>
      <span>But, let me start at the beginning…</span>
    </em>
  </p>
</blockquote>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>yodel with me on twitter @3RatMoon1</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Hubert has tea with Bernadetta. Ferdinand apologizes. Lorenz makes ready to leave Enbarr.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I can't believe we've reached the end!!!</p>
<p>Thanks so much to everyone who commented, left kudos, and encouraged me on Twitter as I struggled through this final chapter. Of course, thanks especially to <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Metallic_Sweet">Metallic_Sweet</a> for their betaing and cheerleading.</p>
<p>I hope this ending is satisfactory to everyone! Thanks for joining me on this journey!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>XIII. Lorenz</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand came at twenty after five. Lorenz didn’t even notice that Ferdinand arrived later than he had said, lost in the work he was suddenly able to do after seeing Hubert.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>The memory still startled him. He had called Ferdinand a </span>
  <em>
    <span>bastard.</span>
  </em>
  <span> He had</span>
  <em>
    <span> laughed</span>
  </em>
  <span> when Hubert echoed the sentiment. It was the closest thing they had come to an understanding. It had been a relief. Lorenz flew through his work afterwards, his mind suddenly clear, and it wasn’t until Ferdinand was there in the office again that everything came back to him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Hello, dear,” Ferdinand said, softly. He looked troubled, or perhaps just deep in thought.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Welcome back,” Lorenz said, trying to remain genial despite the anger that rose up freely in him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand fidgeted with the cuffs of his shirtsleeves. “I…” he paused and cleared his throat. “I would like to speak with you, if you are available.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz stopped writing and looked up. Ferdinand looked back at him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Alright,” Lorenz said, putting his pen back in its holder. “What is it?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand took a breath in and let it out. “I went to see Hubert again.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz felt his heart seize for a moment. Had Hubert told him what had transpired between them?</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“While speaking to him, I realized something,” Ferdinand continued. “I have been working these past months to make up for my transgressions, by being more attentive to you, by not seeing Hubert… but amongst all of that, I never truly apologised.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz’s eyebrows went up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I should have involved you in everything,” Ferdinand said. “Even if you said no. Even if you continued to say no. Even if it was another ten years before I saw Hubert again, or more.” Ferdinand held Lorenz’s gaze.  “I should not have resigned myself to hurting the ones I love. Lorenz— I am so sorry.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz was quiet for several moments. He let out a breath he did not realize he was holding.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Thank you, love,” he said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I know this cannot undo what I have done,” Ferdinand added. “You certainly are not obligated to continue courting me. But… I hope you may allow me to try to win back your trust.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz nodded to himself, not an agreement so much as an acknowledgement.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“And what of Hubert?” he asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand blushed. “Only time will tell. I may court him, if both of you will allow it. I do not know.” He sighed. “Constance told me that we are a part of each other’s lives now, for better or worse, and that it is up to us what we make of it. Whether or not we continue courting each other, or even loving each other, I refuse to continue making your life miserable.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>At that, Lorenz finally smiled.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I think I would like that,” he said.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>XIV. Ferdinand</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand did not know if it was his apology, the mere passage of time, or something else, but after three months, Lorenz was finally readying to return home to Gloucester. Ferdinand supported him no matter his decision, but it left him wondering.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Three months. The thought kept circling his mind even as Manuela moved about the room, picking out various items from her healer’s bag before returning to him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>    “Say ‘ahh’,” said Manuela.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand did as he was told, allowing the healer to look down his throat.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Manuela stepped back. “You are a little red and swollen, but I’m not surprised. I heard you delivered quite the address yesterday.” She smirked. “If you could manage to move the lords with less words, I would call you a miracle worker, but for your health I must ask you to try.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand smiled. “And try I shall.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Manuela proceeded with the check-up, prodding his stomach. “You seem less tense than last week,” she said after a pause. “And you haven’t asked me what Hubert is up to.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand fought the urge to fidget. “Ah. Well,” he started. “It is yet to be seen how well things go, but we do talk occasionally, now.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Manuela did not comment further, and in the silence, Ferdinand thought over the months again. He thought about the nights holding Lorenz while he clung to him. He thought about Hubert’s snarl across the tea table, his tight grip on his coffee cup, purpled hands wishing for a spell that could break the Silence. He thought of his apology to Lorenz.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I have been a fool,” he said out loud.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Manuela looked up from her work, a smile on her lips and one eyebrow raised.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“You don’t say,” she quipped.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand blushed and swallowed, imagining his pride going back down his throat.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I think that I… I mean, after all the chaos of the war…” He stopped, taking a breath. “I think I started to believe that if I was good enough, that if I worked hard enough, if everyone simply gave the control of everything to me, I could somehow fix every ill of the world.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“You could destroy yourself, thinking that,” Manuela said seriously.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Ha!” Ferdinand grinned wryly. “I thought myself a worthy sacrifice, but the truth is that I am not the only one who burns if I stay on this path, and that is neither good nor fair.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“That is very wise,” Manuela said, her smile softer. “For your sake, I hope such wisdom is not too late for you and Lorenz and Hubert.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand’s smile softened as well. “For all our sakes, I will leave such a decision to them.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Manuela nodded and stepped back. “Well, you are quite healthy, other than your throat.” A smile graced her features once more. “I think I shall miss Lorenz; you haven’t worked nearly so much since he extended his stay, and it shows.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand laughed. “How true! Well, I shall be endeavouring to work less even after his departure, instead of ignoring your good advice.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Ah, so you admit to ignoring me!” Manuela said with a grin. “Before, I thought it was simply the time ‘got away’ from you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand ducked his head. He had been thoroughly shamed by his friends lately, which he certainly deserved. He looked up at his friend, the fine lines blossoming around her eyes and the grey streaking through her hair.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I have taken your counsel for granted, of late, and our friendship as well. Please, let me find some way to make up for it. Perhaps a dinner at the Rook and Rose, and I shall shut my mouth for once and let you tell me of all your joys and woes!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Manuela laughed. “Why, Ferdinand! You spoil me!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand smiled. “You deserve nothing less, my princess!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span> XV. Hubert</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>    Bernadetta did respond to Hubert’s letter, and soon after, she found her way from her Enbarr townhouse to the palace. Together, they sat in Hubert’s room while Hubert poured her favorite Albinean Berry tea, then himself his coffee. Bernadetta sat across the table from him with her head bowed and her fingers laced tightly together, but her back was straighter and her demeanor less timid. A part of Hubert was proud of her growth, and another was saddened that he had not been there to see it happen.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“You look well,” Bernadetta said quietly, looking up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert raised a brow. He was no longer the skeletal creature he had been when he first awoke, but he was still quite thin and pale. He still struggled to get around the palace.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Bernadetta lowered her eyes again. “I mean, you look… calmer. Less stressed, maybe.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert hummed. “I suppose. It is strange having so much leisure time,” he admitted.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I understand what you mean,” Bernadetta said with a small smile. “My mother does most of the business for Varley territory on her own, and with the elections coming, I may never have that responsibility myself. So, I’ve just been living in Enbarr on my own, figuring out what I want to do. Maybe I’ll be a tailor, or I’ll make toys for children. I don’t know, yet. I… I think it’s okay not to know, yet, though.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert looked down at his coffee, studying the reflection of the window in its dark surface. “It is… disconcerting. Not knowing.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Of course!” Bernadetta said. “You had your whole purpose set out since you were a boy! Not having that anymore must be terrifying.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert swallowed. The words seemed to run dry; he didn’t know what to say.</span>
  
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Oh, oh no, Hubert, I’m sorry, this is probably not a great topic—” Bernadetta said, her hands fluttering around her like panicked birds.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert held a hand up, and she stilled.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“It is quite alright,” he said. “It is… good. To have someone to speak to.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Bernadetta seemed to relax a little. Carefully, she took a sip of tea. “You know, you are rather nice for someone who spends a lot of time looking scary,” she said. “I’m glad I came to see you. You seemed lonely in your letter.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert was surprised to feel his face warm. “I speak with Manuela and the gardener,” he protested. “Lorenz, occasionally. Ferdinand…” He trailed off. “Well. Regardless, I am grateful for your presence.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Bernadetta smiled. “You can invite me over anytime, as long as you are alright with the idea that I may not always make it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“That is fair to me,” Hubert said. “Once we are done with our drinks, may I show you the greenhouse?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Bernadetta brightened at that. “Of course!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>They finished their drinks quickly after that, trading anecdotes about their favourite plants. Except for the guard following them, it felt almost normal to Hubert to walk down the palace halls with his cane in one hand and Bernadetta’s arm in the crook of his other elbow. Bernadetta’s eyes lit up as they entered the greenhouse, and she pointed at and named the various plants inside.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>    “Oh, they look very happy!” said Bernadetta as they approached the belladonna and hemlock.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>She slipped her arm from Hubert’s to crouch down in front of the plants, smiling.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert felt the corners of his eyes crinkle as he watched her, leaning on his cane. It had been his father’s, fished out of storage by Ferdinand once he heard that Hubert may not need his crutch so often. It was polished black wood with silver accents in the von Vestra style, and Hubert appreciated its aesthetic as much as the sentiment.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I am curious,” Ferdinand had said upon giving it to him. “Why do you feel so beholden to your family’s possessions when you never seemed much endeared to them?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert grinned, then, running his hand over the smooth handle of the cane. “I simply enjoy sullying my family’s objects with hands they once deemed unworthy. That I should be the one to survive to inherit their things is made all the sweeter by their declarations that I would not.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand’s mouth opened in surprise, but then he smiled.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“So, you live out of spite, then?” he asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“As I have before,” Hubert said, then paused. He thought of the greenhouse, of Bernadetta’s letter, of the pink and purple blossoms on the desk behind him. “Though, perhaps, that is not the only reason.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand nodded, his smile a little softer. “That is good. While I find a single ‘reason to be’ romantic, having more than one is… hm. It... makes for a more stable life, I think.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert looked out the window, over the palace grounds and to Enbarr in the distance. “I believe I understand what you mean.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>XVI. Lorenz</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lysithea came to Enbarr to visit Lorenz again almost three months after she came at his request to examine the laboratory.  They sat together at the reception table in Ferdinand’s office, cleared largely of Lorenz’s things as he packed to return to Gloucester. Lorenz poured Lysithea tea, smiling at little as she heaped sugar into her cup.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“What are you smiling about?” Lysithea asked, her tone suspicious but a grin pulling at her lips.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Ah,” said Lorenz, gesturing to her cup. “Two rounded teaspoons into fruit blends, three into any other. It is how you have always done.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lysithea raised a brow. “And?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz thought it over a moment. “I suppose it is comforting, is all. So much of my life has changed these few months that to see some things remain the same…” He was surprised to find his voice catching in his throat. He cleared it. “Excuse me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lysithea waved it off, looking occupied. “I guess that leads into why I’m here,” she said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Oh, yes, your studies on Hubert’s… condition,” Lorenz confirmed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lysithea nodded. “From the looks of it, Hubert is in no danger of turning into a Demonic Beast, which is good. The spell Ferdinand used may need refreshed occasionally, but if not, Hubert will just die. Otherwise…” She looked at Lorenz. “He could live as long as any of us. Maybe longer.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz nodded, then sighed. “He is truly a part of our lives, now,” he said. “For better or worse.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lysithea took a sip of her tea, her eyes still trained on Lorenz, then asked, “Which do you think it will be?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz blinked, startled by the question, then found himself smiling. “I do not know,” he said. “Two months ago, I would have said certainly for the worse, but now… I am not sure.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lysithea continued to watch him for a long moment, studying him. Others would find her stare unnerving, but Lorenz knew that she was simply giving his answer her full thought.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Eventually, she sighed. “I guess, being uncertain can be optimistic, sometimes,” she said. “I will keep looking into this in my free time. Just in case.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz smiled. After so many weeks without anyone to confide in, he realized that he found Lysithea’s practical expression of care comforting.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Thank you, Lysithea,” he said. “Let us move on from this weary business, shall we? How are your other studies? Your treatise on Faith in other gods, perhaps?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lysithea’s eyes lit up.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  
  <span>After Lysithea’s visit, Lorenz had a little time to himself before tea with Ferdinand and Hubert. He had a light lunch in the interest of keeping a schedule, but he wanted to save some appetite, even though he suspected his companions would be understanding. He went between Ferdinand’s room, his guest room, and Ferdinand’s office, checking for any forgotten items.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>It felt strange to peruse those rooms, stripped of the things that made them, at least a little bit, his. There was a squirming in his gut, an urge to call off his return for another two weeks, or four, or six. But, no, he told himself. Gloucester was his home, his territory, his responsibility. All of Leicester was. He had to go back at some point. There was no use in continuing to put it off.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>If Lorenz could not trust Ferdinand without his eyes on him at all times, he could not trust Ferdinand at all, and that was the end of it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>One way or another, Lorenz had to leave Enbarr.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>So, Lorenz gathered the last of his things to give to his aide and freshened up before making his way to the gardens.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>As he was passing the greenhouse, the door opened to reveal none other than Hubert.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Ah,” he said. “It seems I am just in time.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz sighed to himself. The moment with the camellia notwithstanding, he still felt tense around the other man.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“It seems all of us are fond of being early,” he said. “Perhaps we should have set the time to twenty minutes later for accuracy.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>To Lorenz’s surprise, Hubert chuckled. “And then we would not have to spend a minute longer in each others’ presence than we agreed to,” he said, just the barest of a sardonic smile on his lips.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Ah, well, there is nothing to be done about it now,” Lorenz said, turning back to the path.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>They did not exchange any further words as they passed into the gardens proper, but Lorenz still altered his pace so that Hubert could keep up with his cane. Together, they turned a corner around a hedge and stopped before the table set up in its nook, the tea spread already set out and Ferdinand there, lifting the lid of the teapot to peer inside.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand looked up, his face brightening at the sight of the two of them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“You are both just in time! I believe the tea is just steeped enough, now.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz shared a brief look with Hubert before the both of them went to their seats.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“What tea do you have today, my dear?” Lorenz asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“A cinnamon blend,” Ferdinand said proudly, his chest out. “I may have heard that one of us was partial to it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert sighed. “One can never trust staff to keep their mouths shut.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz put up a hand to hide his smile. Hubert aimed a glare at him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I also had a jar of apple butter brought up from the cellar,” Ferdinand continued as if he had missed the exchange entirely. “It is too early for the harvest in Aegir, but apples pair so well with this tea that I could not help myself. Please, enjoy!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>The three of them busied themselves with filling their plates, then. Lorenz noted that Hubert’s selection was nearly as light as his, though Lorenz could not tell if Hubert had less of an appetite, or simply less selection of preferred foods. Lorenz had not paid attention to Hubert’s eating habits before, but upon looking, he saw that he had picked out only the few savoury options. When prodded by Ferdinand, he reluctantly put a daub of apple butter on the corner of his cheese scone, his face screwing up in displeasure upon taking a bite.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Hubert!” Ferdinand exclaimed as the man immediately reached for his tea. “It cannot be that bad!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Leave him be,” Lorenz said, though he had to hide a smile again. “He may simply not have a taste for sweets.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert might have given Lorenz a grateful look over the rim of his cup.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Alright, alright,” Ferdinand said, still smiling good-naturedly. “I will not ask for a second taste.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>For a while, they ate and drank and spoke of inconsequential things. Lorenz felt himself relaxing into his chair, the tension bleeding out of him as the peace continued. He found himself even feeling a little bit hopeful, though cautious all the same.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>After a while, Ferdinand put down his cup with a little more force than necessary.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Oh, pardon me,” he said. “I suppose my nerves are higher than I thought.” He straightened his jacket. “I have a proposal for you both, if you are willing to hear it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz glanced to Hubert, who met his eyes briefly before turning back to Ferdinand.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Of course, my dear,” Lorenz said. “What is it?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand folded his hands in his lap. “Well, I have been thinking of raising some of the restrictions on Hubert’s stay here,” he said. “It would require an oath under veratasia to do no harm, but then a guard would no longer be posted, and the Silence spell could be lifted. Perhaps, with time, you could even be promoted to Minister of Intelligence, Hubert.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert looked dubious. “You are offering me power so soon? You think I could not be deceptive even under the influence of a truth serum?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“You are making quite a case for yourself,” Lorenz quipped.</span>
</p>
<p><span>“With time,”</span> <span>Ferdinand repeated. “I do not want to condemn you to eternal boredom, Hubert. And, if you prove your loyalty to the Adrestian people, I think your skills could be useful.”</span></p>
<p>
  
  <span>“If that is not a viable option, I am sure Lysithea would appreciate a research assistant of your caliber,” Lorenz put in thoughtfully.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Hubert’s eyebrow rose.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“So you approve?” Ferdinand asked excitedly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz thought it over a moment more, then nodded. “Under an oath, yes,” he said. “I believe he has been kept prisoner long enough.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Ferdinand clapped his hands together, smiling brightly. “Then it is settled! I shall have an official hearing with Byleth arranged. Have you ever been to Derdriu, Hubert?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Not since I was a boy, no,” Hubert replied.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“Oh, it is wonderful! We shall have to make a stop in Gloucester as well, and then the three of us can go to the capitol together!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz glanced over to see Hubert studying him. He wasn’t sure what look they shared, but Hubert did not frown or sneer. He just looked at Lorenz, almost as if he was seeing him for the first time.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>Lorenz took a sip of his tea. It was normally much more spicy than he preferred, but there was a sweetness to it as well, an earthiness. A part of him wondered if he could grow to enjoy it more.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>“I would be happy to have you both join me in Gloucester,” Lorenz said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
  <span>He believed that he meant it.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>yell with me about these fools <a href="https://twitter.com/3RatMoon1">@3RatMoon1</a></p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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